


The Gift Of You

by weneebebe



Category: K-pop, Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Canon Compliant, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Foreplay, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Idols, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Requited Love, Semi-Public Sex, Sharing a Bed, Sharing a Room, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:35:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26381260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weneebebe/pseuds/weneebebe
Summary: Jooheon and Minhyuk practically grew up together at the agency; and just as they grew, so did their love for each other.
Relationships: Lee Jooheon/Lee Minhyuk
Comments: 10
Kudos: 58





	1. Mixtape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “let me take you somewhere to help get your mind off things.” He waited patiently for Jooheon to make up his mind, sliding off the bed. “Put your shoes on too,” Minhyuk instructed sweetly, handing him an extra one of his hoodies. “We’re going up to the roof.”

Jooheon puffed his cheeks out cutely, frustrated as he struggled with the zipper on his small suitcase. “Come on, don’t break,” he whispered, anxious. “Just open up...” he sighed, the zipper unmoving and taunting him. He threw his head back and groaned, annoyed.

“Hmm?” A boy walking past the door had heard his plaintive whine and stopped to see what was going on. “Oh! You’re new!” The slim boy dropped to the floor to sit next to Jooheon, and kindly took the suitcase from him. “Let me try,” he smiled brightly. Jooheon only stared; _he must be an older boy,_ he thought, trying to size him up. _He’s so pretty..._ “I’m Minhyuk, by the way,” the smiling boy said after a moment’s struggle with the zipper. “What’s your name?”

“Jooheon,” he replied. “I’m sorry to bother you with this,” he playfully smacked the suitcase, chastising it for being so difficult.

Minhyuk tried one last time, pulling hard. “Got it!” He exclaimed, triumphantly unzipping the boy’s suitcase, falling back against the edge of the bunk bed. “Come, sit with me,” he gently pulled Jooheon by the arm and had him sit next to him against the bed frame. “I’ll help you unpack if you want!”

Jooheon’s pretty cheeks felt warm. “Thanks,” he smiled a little. “I’m kind of nervous about all of this,” he admitted. He turned to look at Minhyuk, whose wide and sparkling eyes instantly disarmed him. “I’m excited too, though.”

Minhyuk patted his knee. “You’ll be great,” he reassured him. “I’ll show you around and everything.”

“Where do you sleep?” Jooheon asked, curious about his new friend.

Minhyuk grinned cutely and flicked his eyes upwards, motioning to the bunk above Jooheon’s. “Right here!” He laughed. “It’s a nice coincidence, huh?”

Something in the way Minhyuk smiled at him then made Jooheon’s heart beat a little faster.

*

It had been several weeks since Jooheon had joined the agency; but he was still having trouble sleeping, it seemed. For the third night in a row, Minhyuk heard Jooheon tossing and turning in the bed beneath his. And for the third night in a row, he wondered if he should reach out to him - literally, figuratively, anything; suddenly, the sounds of the younger boy sniffling in the night made up his mind for him.

He slunk down off his bed and knelt by Jooheon. “Jooheon-ah,” he whispered, extending a hand and feeling for the messy mop of black hair, fingers curling through it soothingly. “Jooheonie,” he cooed. “You okay?”

Jooheon sniffled again. “Can’t sleep,” he whispered back, shifting in the bed to turn and face the older boy. “Homesick, I think.”

Minhyuk’s heart broke. The first few months were always the hardest; he remembered his first fight with homesickness when he’d arrived. His best friend, Hyungwon, had been there for him; and now it was time for him to be there for Jooheon. “Come with me,” he whispered, “let me take you somewhere to help get your mind off things.” He waited patiently for Jooheon to make up his mind, sliding off the bed. “Put your shoes on too,” Minhyuk instructed sweetly, handing him an extra one of his hoodies. “We’re going up to the roof.”

*

“Hyung, it’s cold up here,” Jooheon whined cutely, burrowing into Minhyuk’s open arms. “Why did you take me here?”

“Because it’s beautiful,” Minhyuk replied gently, coaxing Jooheon around so that he could hug his back instead, and help the younger man look out over the city. Together they stood near the ledge, Jooheon’s hands resting on the concrete barrier. Minhyuk sighed into Jooheon’s hair and smiled. “Isn’t the city pretty at night?” He asked, arms tightly hugging him from behind.

Jooheon’s eyes panned the horizon, lit up with neon lights and faraway high-rise apartments. “Yeah,” he said after a while, all trace of tears gone now. “Yeah, it is.”

“I know you miss home, Jooheonie,” Minhyuk said gently, “but look at all of this... one day, soon, everybody out here is gonna know who we are. And our parents are going to be so proud.”

Jooheon let the older boy kiss the top of his head, then. He liked the feeling of being held, even if it was fleeting.

*

“Jooheonie!” Minhyuk came bounding into their shared bedroom and found the other boy scrawling lyrics into a half-full notebook. “I made you something!”

“Hmm?” Jooheon smiled hello at the older boy, and made room for him on his bed. “Come, sit with me for a bit, hyung,” he beamed. “I’ve been writing lyrics, wanna see?”

“Ooh! Always, Honey!” Minhyuk cooed, excited. “But first, close your eyes, I have a present for you.”

“But my birthday isn’t for months, hyung,” Jooheon was confused, but closed his eyes anyway, opening his hands. _What did he bring me?_ He wondered. Minhyuk placed something thin in his hands. _What...?_

“Open up!” Minhyuk instructed, poking Jooheon’s pretty cheeks. “I made it myself.”

Jooheon opened his eyes obediently, and saw what Minhyuk had done - he’d made him a CD; the plastic jewel case was covered in cute doodles of flowers and hearts and bumblebees, with the words “for my honey” written in black sharpie. Jooheon’s eyes lit up, and he attacked Minhyuk with a tight hug. “You made this for me?” He asked, touched.

“It’s all the songs we listen to together,” Minhyuk explained, happy that his gift had made Jooheon smile. “Plus a bunch of songs that remind me of you, and ones that I like too.” He ruffled Jooheon’s hair. “For when you feel homesick,” he explained sweetly.

Jooheon held the CD in his hands like a precious thing - before he could stop himself, he pressed a cartoon-pop kiss to Minhyuk’s cheek. “Thank you, hyung,” he replied. “I love it. I’ll listen to it every day.”

Minhyuk’s heart began to race, and he delicately touched the place where Jooheon’s lips had been; momentarily stunned by the younger boy’s affection, all he could do was nod and laugh gently.

_Oh no,_ he thought. _He’s so cute._


	2. Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I mean, I think... I like him.” 
> 
> Hyungwon looked at Minhyuk and thought a moment. “Oh,” he understood. “Do you... um. Do you want to talk about this?”

Jooheon smiled to himself as he carefully taped the corners of the wrapping paper down. _Hyung is gonna love this,_ he thought happily. It was Valentine’s Day, and the dorms were rather prettily decorated with pink and red crepe paper streamers and construction paper hearts. The bosses had come around to all the trainees and given them fancy chocolates, too; there was sugar in the air, and at least for one day, the stress and strain of being a sleep-deprived trainee had evaporated into the ether. He finished wrapping the gift - a squishy, stuffed whale plushie - and held it carefully in his hands, creeping out of the bedroom and checking the hallway for Minhyuk. He wanted to give him his present when they were alone, or as near as they could get to it; he could do without the other boys whooping and cooing at them, cheapening the moment (good-natured as they were).

As luck would have it, Minhyuk came strolling by, tongue swirling suggestively over a large, heart-shaped lollipop, arm draped around another older boy, Hoseok. He clocked Jooheon in the doorway, and his eyes lit up. “Honey!” He slid next to him with a smile. “Want a lick?” He thrust the lollipop into Jooheon’s face.

The younger boy went bright red - he shook his head vigorously in protest. “N-no, I’m good,” he choked out, making Hoseok and Minhyuk giggle.

Minhyuk shrugged and took the candy back, licking a long stripe across it. “Too bad! It’s delicious,” he winked. “What’s up, Honey? We were going to sneak out and get some iced coffees,” he cocked his head towards Hoseok.

“Wanna come with us?” Hoseok asked, a hand lacing fingers together with Minhyuk’s around his shoulder. Jooheon felt a little sting - of what? jealousy, perhaps - to see how comfortably the older boy touched him.

“Um,” Jooheon held fast to the Valentine present behind his back. “No, maybe another time,” he said, eyes downcast. “Don’t get caught, hyung,” he added, playfully bumping Minhyuk’s shoulder. “Will you guys be back in time for movie night?”

“Of course,” Minhyuk replied, a little pouty over the answer Jooheon had given. “See you in a bit!” He winked, and the pair left him in the hallway, gift hidden closely behind his back.

 _Well._ Jooheon sighed. _That’s a new feeling_. He patted his cheeks, trying to ease their sudden flush. _What was that?_ He chastised himself, wondering why he’d suddenly felt jealous of Hoseok; almost territorial. _He’s_ ** _my_** _friend,_ he thought stubbornly. **_My_** _best friend._

*

Minhyuk came bouncing back into the shared bedroom with a special gift for Jooheon - he’d bought an extra red bean taiyaki at the stall on the corner just for him; but when he reached the bedroom, he found only emptiness. _Where are you, Honey?_ He pondered, standing in the center of the room. His eyes naturally flicked upwards to his bed, where he saw a pink and red paper-wrapped present resting on his pillow. Curious, he climbed up to see what it was and who had left it; swinging his legs over the side of the bed, he held the present in his lap.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, To Minhyukie-hyung from your Honey,” he read softly, almost reverently as his long fingers traced the cramped lettering, done in sharpie on the wrapping paper. His heart thumped in his chest, and he felt a rising blush begin to creep up his neck. _Honey got me a Valentine’s Day present...?_ He carefully unwrapped the gift, and his eyes immediately filled with happy tears when he saw what it was - a whale plushie, one that he had seen on a walk with Jooheon, weeks prior; he’d mentioned how much he loved whales, wanted to swim with them, draw them - and the younger boy had remembered all that, and gone out on his own, and bought it for him. He held the toy close, burying his face in it and sighing. _He knows me so well,_ _that kid,_ he thought. _Why do I have tears in my eyes?_ Minhyuk pressed a hand to his cheek. _Am I blushing...?_ ****

Minhyuk did not have time to ruminate on that for long - Hyungwon leaned into the doorway, arms outstretched against the frame. “Yo!” He grinned. “Hey, why are you—“ he noticed Minhyuk’s glassy eyes. “Are you okay?”

And then, suddenly, Minhyuk wasn’t. He sniffled, waving the other boy off, a few tears catching the light and shining on his cheeks. “I’m fine,” he lied. “It’s stupid.”

Hyungwon ignored him and climbed up onto his bed. “What’s wrong?” He asked, voice soft.

“Nothing’s _wrong,”_ Minhyuk tried to clarify, shaking his head. “I don’t know _why_ I’m crying,” he said. He showed Hyungwon the message scrawled on the wrapping paper. “Honey left me this. I had gone out with Seokie-hyung to get iced coffees... and when I came back, it was on my bed.”

Hyungwon took the paper and read the note, smiling at how careful, yet still cramped and childish, the handwriting was. “He’s such a sweetheart,” Hyungwon mused. “I like him a lot.”

Minhyuk’s heart ached. “I think... I think I do, too.” He said, drying his eyes.

“Of course you do,” Hyungwon playfully smacked his shoulder. “You’re roommates.”

“No,” Minhyuk shook his head. “I mean, I think... I _like_ him.”

Hyungwon looked at Minhyuk and thought a moment. _“Oh,”_ he understood. “Do you... um. Do you want to talk about this?” He asked, unsure of what to do or say.

“I don’t know,” Minhyuk replied honestly. “For now, can you just...” he looked at Hyungwon through long lashes, face obscured by the whale plushie in his arms. “Can you... can you _promise_ me you won’t tell him?”

“I promise,” Hyungwon smiled softly. “Now come on,” he said, sliding down the bed and onto the floor, “come and join us all for movie night.”

“Okay.”

*

It was White Day, and Minhyuk was very pleased with himself. He’d slipped away from the others while they were having lunch, and had gone to the nearby stationery store to buy the cutest set of bumblebee pens, pencil case, and compact mirror set he could find - “Honey’s gonna love this,” he smiled to himself, muttering under his breath. He patted his cheeks to try and calm the rising blush that crept up from his neck; it had been a month since that tearful conversation with Hyungwon, and his heart had only grown more attached to the younger boy. Since then, he’d had countless late-night conversations with Hyungwon about it, and he wasn’t scared of his feelings anymore.

_“If you don’t tell him, will you be satisfied with just being his friend?” Hyungwon asked, sipping his strawberry milk. "Even if it hurts?"_

_Minhyuk ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah,” he said after a moment’s thought. “I’m happy just to be by his side,” he smiled a little. “Even if this turns out to be a one-sided love, that’s still a beautiful thing, right?”_

_Hyungwon patted Minhyuk’s thigh and offered him a sip of his milk. “You’re such a poet,” he said softly._

Minhyuk checked the time. Jooheon would be done with his dance class soon; he’d come back to the bedroom to get a change of clothes before going to shower. _I’ll give it to him now,_ he thought. He sat expectantly on Jooheon’s bed, the gift wrapped carefully and waiting in his lap.

Suddenly, he heard a familiar voice chattering away from down the hall, and his cheeks flushed pink; a Pavlovian response. Jooheon appeared in the doorway, pretty cheeks bright pink and his hair stuck to his forehead, beads of sweat stubbornly clinging to his skin. “Hyung!” He smiled brightly, “what's up?”

“Come sit, Honey,” Minhyuk grinned back, and patted the empty space next to him.

Jooheon’s face was momentarily puzzled until his eyes fell on the present in Minhyuk’s lap; he climbed onto the bed and sat next to the older boy. “What’s that?” He pointed to his lap.

“A present,” Minhyuk replied coyly, wiggling his eyebrows. 

“For who?” Jooheon grinned, resting his chin on Minhyuk’s shoulder.

“For you,” Minhyuk sing-songed, and scrunched his nose cutely, nuzzling Jooheon’s cheek. “It’s White Day, remember?”

The young boy counted the days on his hands. “Oh yeah!” He nodded. “Can I...?” He eyed the gift, and Minhyuk handed it over, a little spark of electricity when their hands touched; and Minhyuk found himself wishing they could hold hands forever. “Sorry I’m so sweaty,” he said after a moment, feeling Minhyuk’s eyes on him. “I’ll go shower.”

“Open this first,” Minhyuk replied sweetly, wrapping an arm around Jooheon’s waist. “I don’t mind.”

Minhyuk’s pretty voice in his ear made Jooheon’s heart ache, thumping in his chest as he carefully unwrapped the gift. As soon as he saw the bumblebee motif, his face lit up like a child on Christmas. “So cute!” He exclaimed, examining each piece of stationery in the parcel. “Thank you,” he turned to better face Minhyuk on the mattress. “I love them,” he said, eyes round and sparkling.

 _What else do you love...?_ Minhyuk wanted to ask. Instead, though, he squeezed around Jooheon’s middle and pinched his cheek. “Happy White Day, my honey boy,” he lovingly combed Jooheon’s damp hair from his forehead, not minding the other boy’s sweat at all.

“Thanks, hyung,” Jooheon blushed a little. He thought he saw something in Minhyuk’s eyes then, but couldn’t name quite what it might be; he pushed the feeling down. “I...” he tried to find his balance. “I should go shower,” he said, getting up from the bed.

His heart beat so loudly inside him that he wondered if Minhyuk might hear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes I know this is tagged for smut... it's coming in the next chapter I promise >.>


	3. Rooftop Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minhyuk loved how Jooheon kissed; slowly, almost agonizingly, desperately deliberate - every swipe of his tongue a perfect motion, every graze of his teeth against his lips was electric. Minhyuk always came away from kissing Jooheon with a lightheadedness that made him smile. He sighed into the kiss, deepening it and pressing their hips together against the roof’s edge, wanting to feel as much of Jooheon as he could. “My honey...” he murmured against Jooheon’s lips, “I don't want to think for a while..." he grinned, eyes darkening. "Let’s do something stupid...” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *note: nsfw towards the end!

Minhyuk’s face was buried in his pillow, and he held his whale plushie close to his chest. He was crying. The boss’s words echoed in his head like an awful, taunting incantation. _You’re not good enough to debut now,_ he’d said. _You’ll have one more shot. We’re putting together a survival show in a few weeks. If you get cut from that, we’ll have to let you go._ Minhyuk curled into himself, hating the fact that he couldn’t keep the tears at bay.

 _I’m sorry, mom..._ he sniffled, rubbing his eyes harshly to try and stop his crying - it didn’t work. Turning onto his other side, facing the wall, he sobbed into his pillow.

Until —

“Hyung?” A familiar voice instantly stopped his tears.

_Jooheon._

Minhyuk wiped his eyes and sniffled. “Honey...” he murmured, voice small. “Honey, I’m done for...”

Jooheon knew better than to try and coax the older boy out of his bed when he was sad, so he slipped his shoes off and joined him; curling in next to him and wrapping his arms around his waist. “What happened?” He asked, wiping his cheeks with the hem of his sleeve. “I’ve been looking for you since lunch.” Jooheon could see how hard the older boy had been crying; his pillow was damp under him, his cheeks flushed and wet. He cursed himself for spending extra long with Gunhee on the roof, rapping at each other and joking around. _I should have found you sooner,_ he thought. _Maybe I could have stopped your tears..._ ****

Minhyuk took Jooheon’s hand in his and curled their fingers together against his chest. “The bosses told me that I have one last chance to debut or I’m kicked out of the company,” he explained, voice stuttering through sobs in his throat. “They mentioned a survival show they’re putting together soon. They said if I get cut from that, then I’m done here.” Tears began to fall afresh. “Honey, I don’t want to go...” he turned in the bed to face Jooheon and melted into the younger boy’s arms. “I don’t want to leave you.”

Jooheon’s heart broke to see his hyung like this; his heart began to race, too. _They can’t take you away from me,_ he thought, panicking. _They can’t take you from me, I won’t let them..._ “Hyung,” he held Minhyuk close, chin in his hair. “I won’t let us be separated.” His voice was small, but defiant. “If they make you leave,” he looked the older boy in the eye, and wiped his tears. “If they make you leave, I’m quitting too.”

“Honey, what about the music—” ****

“Fuck the music,” he interjected. “There’s no point in debuting if you’re not with me.”

Minhyuk sniffled again, trying to calm himself down - being in Jooheon’s arms was certainly helping to slow his heartbeat back to normal, and he was grateful for the warmth. “Honey, you’ve worked so hard...”

“So have _you,_ hyung,” he reminded him gently, combing his hair with sure fingers. “You’re one of the hardest-working people I’ve ever met. Let’s...” he breathed in, the pretty floral scent of Minhyuk’s perfume calming his heart. “Let’s stay together, no matter what. Promise?”

Minhyuk’s eyes were round, sparkling with something Jooheon couldn’t quite place; but his heart ached to look at him. “I promise,” the older boy said finally, a little smile on his pretty lips. “My honey boy,” he cooed, nestling into Jooheon’s neck. “Stay with me.”

“I’m not going anywhere, hyung.” Jooheon hugged him tighter. “Let’s just sleep for now,” he absent-mindedly kissed the top of Minhyuk’s head, soothing him. “Things will look better in the morning.”

“Okay,” Minhyuk sighed into Jooheon, remarking that he was wearing the perfume he’d given him for Christmas last year. _You still have it..._ he thought happily, as he closed his eyes.

**_*_ **

Minhyuk awoke in the night to Jooheon’s soft sleep-talking; the younger boy had curled their hands together, as they lay face-to-face, and he seemed to be whispering into their entwined fingers. _Even sleeping, he’s so pretty,_ Minhyuk indulged himself, so close to him - he poked his cheek gently, reveling in how soft it was. _You’re so cute, my Honey..._ ****

“Min... Minhyukie-hyung...” Jooheon murmured, pretty cheeks squished against the pillow. Minhyuk’s eyes widened a little at the mention of his name, and his heart jumped. _Are you dreaming of me?_ He carefully combed Jooheon’s hair from his face - the rapper sighed at his touch, but still did not wake. “Minnie-hyung...” he murmured again, eyes still shut, “kiss me...” ****

 _What? What did you say...?_ Minhyuk’s heart stopped; he froze in place, one hand still curled around the back of Jooheon’s neck. He’d be lying if he said he’d never thought about kissing the younger boy; indeed, the thought of kissing Jooheon took up considerable real estate in the vocalist’s mind. But he never thought that he’d be in this position - he’d long ago resigned himself to loving Jooheon from afar, and he was (for the most part) alright with that. But now, in the still of the night, the familiar scent of Jooheon’s shampoo making him dizzy, with the sleeping boy in his arms, asking to be kissed, in the middle of some dream - it was all too much. He whispered, “Jooheonie... do you want me to kiss you?” His heart in his throat; he prayed to every god that was listening that Jooheon would not be awoken by the pounding in his chest.

“Mmm...” Jooheon murmured, his lips falling open a little against the pillow.

Minhyuk swallowed hard. _Fuck it,_ he thought. _If he doesn’t wake up, then it’s nothing, right?_ He curled his fingers through Jooheon’s hair and looked at him - _really_ looked; he saw how round and pink his cheeks were, the slope of his nose, the pretty, sharp bow of his top lip. He brought his face close and took a deep breath. Closing his eyes, Minhyuk pressed a gentle kiss to Jooheon’s lips; warmth spread through his whole body, and it felt like he’d been touched by sunshine. _His lips are so soft against mine—_

And then - Jooheon began to kiss back. The younger boy snaked his arms around Minhyuk’s waist and pulled him in closer, and his eyes fluttered open. “Hyung...?” He whispered.

Minhyuk froze, at once mortified at having been caught and terrified he’d ruined everything. “Honey, I...” his lip quivered. “I’m sorry, I...”

“Hyung,” Jooheon pressed their foreheads together. “How long...” he whispered, their legs still intertwined. “How long have you wanted to kiss me?”

Minhyuk didn’t know how to answer that question; instead, he took Jooheon’s hand in his and clasped it to his chest. “How long have you been dreaming about kissing _me?”_ He countered.

Jooheon blushed a little at that. “How did you know?” He asked, pouting. “Hyung, I...”

“It’s okay, Honey,” Minhyuk pulled him in close, wrapping his arms around the younger man. “I think... I think I’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time,” he admitted, nose in Jooheon’s crown. “You’re so special to me, my honeybee,” he said softly, fingers rubbing through the rapper’s hair.

Jooheon’s body seemed to relax in Minhyuk’s arms at his admission. “Hyung, you...” he buried his face in Minhyuk’s chest. “You’re my most precious person,” he murmured, his own heart pounding in his chest. “I... I think I really love you, Minhyukie-hyung.”

At that, Minhyuk’s eyes began to water - he never thought he’d ever hear Jooheon say those words to him; he took the younger boy’s face in his hands and kissed him then, softly, slowly, deliberately. Jooheon pulled him in closer, strong arms around the vocalist’s slim waist - Minhyuk pressed his tongue at the seam of Jooheon’s lips, and to his surprise, the younger boy sighed into the kiss and deepened it quickly. Minhyuk’s mind swam with a million different thoughts, but all he could stutter out was a breathless “I love you so much, Jooheonie,” before the rapper slipped his hands beneath the fabric of his shirt and he nearly fainted at the gentle, exploring touch of the other boy. ****

Jooheon pressed little kisses along Minhyuk’s cheek and neck. “Promise me that no matter what, we’ll always be together,” he whispered, eyes round like saucers and sparkling like the night sky.

“I promise, honeybee,” Minhyuk replied readily; of course he promised that; wild horses could not drag him away from Jooheon, not now - not now that the rapper was in his arms, kissing his cheeks and lips and neck like it was the most natural thing in the world. “I love you more than anything,” he said softly, cupping Jooheon’s soft cheeks in his hands.

“Good,” Jooheon smiled, kissing him again. “Because I don’t want to share you, hyung,” he smiled a little.

*

The dorm was quiet, tearful - another round of eliminations had rocked the increasingly small group of boys, and emotions were raw. The boys were exhausted; nerves were frayed; there would only be two more elimination nights before a new group would be chosen. Minhyuk and Jooheon stood nearly motionless in the kitchen, braced against the countertops, and trying to take in the enormity of the situation. Their eyes had a conversation when their lips failed.

_Are you alright?_

_Yeah. No. Maybe? I don’t know._

_I don’t know how much more of this I can take._

_At least you weren’t in the bottom three this week._

_I know. I’m glad you’re still here with me, though._

_I need a break. It’s all too much._

_I have an idea._

Jooheon extended his hand for Minhyuk to take; wordlessly, they slipped on their shoes and snuck out of the dorm, making their way up to the roof.

The night sky was black as pitch and full of stars; the air was cool, but not cold - the pair made their way to the edge of the roof and leaned over the short wall, observing the world below them.

Jooheon wrapped his arms around Minhyuk’s waist and kissed his cheek.“Do you remember, ages and ages ago,” he kissed him again, slowly. “When you first took me up here after I’d just joined the company?” Minhyuk nodded, a smile on his face at the memory. “Do you remember what you said to me that night?”

Minhyuk did remember, but he loved it when Jooheon told stories. “What did I say, honeybee?” He asked sweetly, hands slipping into Jooheon’s jacket and wrapping around his waist.

Jooheon smiled and kissed Minhyuk’s forehead. “You held me close, like this,” he spun Minhyuk around so that he faced the city, and held him from behind, chin resting on his shoulder. “And you said, ‘one day, soon, everybody out here is gonna know who we are. And our parents are going to be so proud.’ You held me just like this, and you told me everything was going to be okay, Minnie,” he kissed the older boy’s shoulder. “And everything _is_ going to be okay.” He turned Minhyuk around to face him again, slowly; and taking the older boy’s chin in his hand, he kissed him.

Minhyuk loved how Jooheon kissed; slowly, almost agonizingly, desperately deliberate - every swipe of his tongue a perfect motion, every graze of his teeth against his lips was electric. Minhyuk always came away from kissing Jooheon with a lightheadedness that made him smile. He sighed into the kiss, deepening it and pressing their hips together against the roof’s edge, wanting to feel as much of Jooheon as he could. “My honey...” he murmured against Jooheon’s lips, “I don't want to think for a while..." he grinned, eyes darkening. "Let’s do something stupid...”

Jooheon smiled. Minhyuk was always so impulsive; it made being in love with him interesting. “What do you have in mind?” He asked, curling fingers through the older boy’s hair, feeling the arousal build between them. He held the vocalist’s gaze for a beat longer before Minhyuk got that telltale flash of an idea in his eye - and pulled Jooheon off to the side, against the wall. Careful eyes flit around, looking for cameras; it didn’t matter, it was dark and they faced away from them anyway - and Minhyuk was past the point of caring all that much.

“Let’s play,” Minhyuk whined, arousal caught in his throat as he slipped his hands beneath the fabric of Jooheon’s shirt. “I want you...” he kissed down Jooheon’s neck, an obedient hand resting at the waistband of his jeans. His eyes flicked upwards and looked at Jooheon through long lashes, expectant. He pressed their hips together, making Jooheon groan at the feeling of his heat. Jooheon lolled his head back against the wall, and Minhyuk kissed at his neck again, carefully undoing the buttons of his jeans. He smirked to see how pliant Jooheon was; but then again, they both needed a little indulgence. He dropped to his knees, and Jooheon instinctively brought his hand to Minhyuk’s hair, combing the fringe from his eyes as he took the rapper’s length in his mouth. Bracing himself against the wall, Jooheon sighed in relief at the warmth of the older boy’s tongue on him. In the relative freedom of the darkness, he groaned, knowing no one would be able to hear them - the street noise masked his every sigh.

Minhyuk’s lips on him felt so good, so familiar; so soothing - but he did not want to come like this. He gently pulled on Minhyuk’s hair, beckoning him rise. Minhyuk lolled his tongue over Jooheon’s length one last time before standing and crashing their mouths together, pressing his body against the rapper’s and rolling his hips into him. “Why’d you stop me, baby...?” He purred against his neck, reaching to stroke Jooheon instead.

Jooheon knocked his head back against the wall at the feeling of Minhyuk’s strong fingers on him. “Wanna be inside you, Min...” he moaned prettily, kissing downMinhyuk’s jaw.

Hearing Jooheon talk like that always made him shiver a little; he liked it when the rapper took control. _“Please,_ Honey...” Minhyuk sighed into Jooheon’s mouth as they kissed, needy and hot and hard. “Please, fuck me...” he rolled his hips into Jooheon, grinning against his lips; pretty canines catching the moonlight.

Jooheon’s hands traveled down to Minhyuk’s jeans, skillful fingers quickly undoing the buttons and taking his length in his hand. Minhyuk was painfully hard; Jooheon stroked him slowly, teasingly. He was desperate to fill the vocalist; pressing fingers against Minhyuk’s lips, the older boy swirled his tongue around them, sucking and biting at them playfully. Jooheon pulled Minhyuk’s jeans off, and let them hang precariously from one foot while he hoisted his free leg up and pressed his fingers against his entrance, making Minhyuk shiver with want and anticipation. “Come on, baby...” Minhyuk wrapped his arms loosely around Jooheon’s shoulders, his leg curled around the other boy’s waist. “Fill me...” he kissed him, lips warm and soft and familiar; Jooheon loved how Minhyuk kissed; like each time was a renewed love confession full of hope and promise and desire. It made him warm all over, and at that moment nothing else seemed to matter. He eased his fingers inside and began to work him open, Minhyuk shivering at the feeling of being filled and grasping at his shirt tighter with every twist of his wrist.

Jooheon could feel that he was ready, and he slipped his fingers from the vocalist and took himself in his hand instead, groaning in relief as he at last pushed inside. _“Fuck,_ Min...” he rolled his head against Minhyuk’s shoulder. “You feel so good...” he curled Minhyuk’s legs around his waist, holding him up against the wall - he thought for a moment that the texture of the brick and metal siding might hurt Minhyuk - his eyes kept darting past the vocalist.

“Don’t worry about the wall,” Minhyuk panted, knowing what was bothering Jooheon. “It doesn’t hurt. It...” he curled his legs around Jooheon’s hips tighter, making the rapper fuck into him deeper. He grunted. “I like the pain. It feels good,” he kissed him then, teeth dragging across Jooheon’s plush lips. “More, Honey,” he cooed, curling his fingers through the younger boy’s hair. “Give me more...!” He found his favorite spot on Jooheon’s neck and pressed slow, open-mouthed kisses there, biting and sucking the pretty skin to keep from crying out too loudly and Jooheon quickened his pace, slamming into him and bucking his hips.

Minhyuk moaned filthy curses into Jooheon’s neck with every thrust, and it made his head swim. “Min, _fuck..._ I’m so close,” Jooheon groaned, trying to slow and measure his movements. “I’m gonna...”

 _“Please,_ baby...” Minhyuk held onto the younger boy tighter, desperately wanting to be filled by him. “Come, come into me...!” Minhyuk held Jooheon’s gaze, their foreheads pressed together as the rapper gripped Minhyuk’s thighs, and shuddered in orgasm, filling the vocalist. Minhyuk gasped for air, arousal caught in his throat as he, too, came - each boy resting his head against the other’s shoulder, bracing each other, panting into the night air. _“Fuck...”_ Minhyuk managed after a moment, catching his breath. “Fuck, I needed that...”

Jooheon sighed, carefully setting Minhyuk back onto his feet and leaning into him against the wall. _“God,_ Minnie...” he ran a hand through his hair, breathless, stroking his cheeks and neck with gentle fingers, covering him with kisses. “That was... that was...”

“Yeah,” Minhyuk agreed, cheeks flushed pink and a satiated smile on his kiss-swollen lips. “Yeah,” was all he could say in response.

Jooheon helped the older boy dress again, and they found their way back to the roof’s edge to stand and look out at the sparkling, unreachable city in the distance.

“We’re gonna be alright, aren’t we?” Jooheon said softly after a while, lacing their fingers together.

Minhyuk kissed Jooheon’s hand in his. “Yeah,” he replied. “If we’re together, we can do anything.”

“I love you, Minhyukie-hyung,” Jooheon reminded him, pulling him into a hug.

“I love you more,” Minhyuk countered sweetly, kissing his cheek and noticing his handiwork - a large, blooming bruise on his neck. “You... uh,” he raised his eyebrow. “You have concealer downstairs, right?” He asked suspiciously.

“Yeah, why?” Jooheon asked, oblivious. He followed Minhyuk’s eyes and pressed careful fingers to his neck, wincing as he touched the bruise. “Oh, I’m gonna _kill_ you,” he hissed jokingly. “How big is it?!”

Minhyuk pretended to be apologetic. “It’s pretty big,” he sing-songed.

“Fuck.”

Laughter.


	4. Red String

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Forever and ever,” Minhyuk promised him, “forever and ever, I will love you.”
> 
> Jooheon pulled Minhyuk back into bed and attacked him with kisses. “Forever and ever,” he parroted. “No matter what.”

“You’ve got to eat something, baby,” Minhyuk curled delicate fingers through Jooheon’s hair as they lay in bed. “If I made you food myself, would you eat just a little?”

Jooheon couldn’t help but smile, albeit weakly, at that. _You take such care of me,_ he thought sweetly. “Okay,” he agreed. “I’m sorry I haven’t been myself, Min,” he sighed, the weight of the world on his tongue. “I’m sorry you’ve had to drop everything and look after me.”

Minhyuk shook his head and kissed Jooheon’s cheek. “No sorrys, honeybee,” he replied, nestling in closer. “I will always take care of you.” He kissed him slowly then, gentle hands cupping Jooheon’s soft cheeks, his face grown a little thinner from the stress of the last few months. “Come on, baby,” he said after a moment, foreheads pressed together. “Let’s get some food in you.”

The older man pulled Jooheon up and out of bed, and they walked into the kitchen hand in hand.

*

With everyone having eaten and been sent off to bed by a stern, but equally tired Hyunwoo, Jooheon and Minhyuk were left alone in Hoseok’s room - the vocalist had let Jooheon move into his room in his absence, wanting him to have a comfortable bed to rest and recover in, now that he himself was on a self-imposed hiatus to try and mitigate things; Hoseok would move between his mother’s house and his studio, at least for now. It wasn’t ideal, but it was what needed to be done while his return was being planned.

Jooheon allowed Minhyuk to baby him just a little more than usual; plaiting little braids in his mass of messy black hair, pressing little kisses to his cheeks and temples as they lay together; Jooheon encircled comfortably between Minhyuk’s arms and legs, protected from everything. He sighed as Minhyuk’s careful hands slipped below the neckline of his shirt, tracing lines along his collarbones. “Minnie,” he lolled his head against Minhyuk’s shoulder. “I don’t want to think for a while...” he turned to better face the older man and curled into his arms. “I don’t want to think anymore,” he kissed Minhyuk’s neck, making the vocalist shiver. “Help me, _please...”_ he held Minhyuk’s gaze then; his eyes tired, red from oversleep, and crying. Minhyuk’s heart broke to see the one he loved most in the world looking back at him with eyes like that.

Minhyuk rolled on top of the rapper, kissing him slowly, making sure that with every swipe of his tongue he could make Jooheon feel just how loved he was. “Okay, baby,” Minhyuk breathed against his skin. “Let’s forget everything for a little while, just you and me.” He straddled Jooheon and kissed down his cheeks and neck, wanting so desperately to make him feel good - even if it was fleeting, and reality came crashing down on them moments after. “Let me take care of you...” he slipped Jooheon’s shirt off and kissed every inch of the rapper’s smooth chest and stomach, his heart breaking with happiness with every sigh that spilled from Jooheon’s parted lips. “My beautiful boy,” Minhyuk cooed as he kissed along the rapper’s adonis belt. “I love you so much.” Jooheon flushed a pretty pink at the older man’s praise; though it was hardly the first time he’d been so flattered by him, each time felt special. Jooheon relaxed entirely under Minhyuk’s attentive, languid touch; and his eyes grew heavy-lidded with desire, cheeks growing warm and his thighs quivering a little with every tease of the older man’s fingers along their smooth, muscular expanse. He began to palm Jooheon through his boxers, and the noise of relief, the noise of want that escaped the rapper’s lips made Minhyuk dizzy. He slipped his hand beneath the fabric and began to stroke, wanting to make Jooheon feel good.

Jooheon’s hips began to roll in time with Minhyuk’s movements, and he covered his mouth loosely to keep from moaning too loudly - Minhyuk gently guided his hand away from his lips. “It doesn’t matter, Honey,” he cooed softly, continuing to stroke. “I won’t let you hide how you feel, not anymore...” he kissed along his neck. “No more keeping anything inside,” he looked him in the eye, combing the fringe from his eyes. “Don’t keep anything inside.” He kissed him then, holding Jooheon’s cheek in his hand and caressing the smooth skin, holding his face like it was a rare and precious thing. He kissed down Jooheon’s body again, fingers splayed wide across his stomach and holding his hip as he took him in his mouth at last, wringing a satisfied, sharp hiss from Jooheon’s lips. Minhyuk lolled his tongue expertly over and around the sensitive head, and it made Jooheon shiver happily under his touch, arching his back and clutching at the sheets with every flick of his wrist. “Baby, you want more...?” Minhyuk asked as he continued his ministrations. “Want more, Honey?”

“Mmm...” Jooheon murmured his agreement, biting his lip. “Fuck me, Minnie...” he reached for the older man’s hand and laced their fingers together. “Make me feel good, babe, _please...”_ His eyes, half-closed and heavy-lidded with desire, sparkled full of love for the older man and it made Minhyuk warm all over. He climbed up the bed and stretched over to the bedside table, feeling for the familiar, small bottle of lubricant he’d stashed there since moving Jooheon into Hoseok’s room. Fingers instinctively wrapping around it, he flipped the cap and squeezed a little of the thick liquid into his hands, warming it through - he spread Jooheon’s thighs, kissing up his calves to his knees as he did so before taking him in his mouth again and beginning to massage his entrance, working him open easily.

Jooheon’s entire body relaxed under Minhyuk’s skillful, practiced hands; and he moaned prettily, aching to be filled. He rolled his hips against Minhyuk’s strong fingers, wanting more - Minhyuk slipped off his boxers and positioned himself, stroking his heat and pressing it teasingly at Jooheon’s entrance. _“Please,_ hyung,” Jooheon whined. “Give it to me...” his eyes met Minhyuk’s, then, and it was all the older man could do not to lose himself in that moment.

He spread Jooheon’s thighs further and eased himself inside at last, both men groaning in relief - Minhyuk slowly filled him to the hilt, shuddering in delight at the familiar feeling of Jooheon’s warmth. _“Oh,_ baby...” the vocalist exhaled, mouth curled in a pretty grin, bared teeth catching the bedside light. “Honey, you feel so good,” he built up a steady rhythm, long, delicate fingers caressing Jooheon’s thighs with every buck and roll of his hips. “You’re so _perfect,_ my honey boy...” Jooheon couldn’t help the little smile that crept onto his full and pretty lips at the praise; no matter how often Minhyuk fawned over him, he felt so _seen,_ so _loved,_ each time. In that moment, he was so indescribably grateful for Minhyuk’s constant, unwavering love that he felt tears begin to collect at the corner of his eyes. Minhyuk noticed immediately, slowing his movements and hunching down, wrapping Jooheon in his arms. “Baby, do you want to stop...?” He kissed Jooheon’s closed eyes. “What’s wrong?”

Jooheon held Minhyuk’s face in his hands, pressing their foreheads together and kissing him softly. “I just...” he breathed against his lips. “I just love you, so much...” he looked into Minhyuk’s eyes, round with love and concern. “It’s all just a bit... it’s a lot,” he smiled softly. “Being reminded how much I love you.”

Minhyuk melted into Jooheon’s arms. “Oh, baby,” he kissed Jooheon’s cheek. “My beautiful Honey...” He nestled in close, lips against the rapper’s collarbone. “It’s you and me, Jooheonie,” he said after a moment. “It’s always gonna be just you and me.”

“Forever?” Jooheon asked, a hand curling through Minhyuk’s hair as they lay together.

“Forever and ever,” Minhyuk replied. Then, as if nudged by some divine spirit, his eyes widened and he smiled. “I was going to give this to you on our anniversary, but...” he rolled off of Jooheon and, slipping his boxers back on, crept away to the other room without a word, leaving the younger man understandably confused. He sat up in bed, and combed the fringe from his eyes. Minhyuk re-emerged quickly, his hands behind his back. “Jooheonie,” he smiled, kneeling at the bedside. “I have something for you.”

Jooheon shifted to better face Minhyuk, a little smile of anticipation curling in his lips. “What is it, Minnie?” He asked, wondering what it could be. _Our anniversary isn’t for another three months, but you planned this already?_

“I found this on our last trip to America,” he explained. “I saw it and thought about you right away,” he presented Jooheon with a small jewelry box. “So I bought it, and decided to wait for a good time to give it to you.” He opened it, and Jooheon’s eyes immediately filled with tears afresh.

 _“Oh,”_ Jooheon took the box from Minhyuk’s outstretched hand. “It’s gorgeous,” he managed, tears catching in his throat. “Minnie...” he wrapped his arms around Minhyuk’s shoulders and drew him in, kissing him. “Thank you...”

“I know we can’t...” Minhyuk’s voice grew small. “I know we can’t be public about any of this, but I just thought...” he slipped the ring onto Jooheon’s wedding finger. “I thought we could have this, just for us.”

“I love it,” he smiled, examining it. “But,” he cocked his head, curious. “Shouldn’t you have one, too?”

Minhyuk beamed. “Right here!” He produced another box from his pocket. “Come on, handsome,” he handed it to him. “Propose to me.” He grinned expectantly, closing his eyes and putting out his hand.

Jooheon laughed; _he’s such a little shit, even at a moment like this..._ he opened the box, noting that the rings were the same; a beautifully shining silver - their names etched into the inner band, connected by a heart. He took Minhyuk’s hand in his, caressing the soft skin with his thumb. “Lee Minhyuk,” he began, voice smooth and sure. “Since we were kids, you’ve been by my side.” He kissed Minhyuk’s hand, and the vocalist’s eyes fluttered open at the touch of Jooheon’s lips. “You’re so precious to me,” he said, holding Minhyuk’s gaze. “And...” he pouted a little at his next words, knowing how unfair it was, “even though I know you’re right, and we can’t be honest about this... I want to be together with you for the rest of my life if you’ll have me.” He carefully slipped the ring onto Minhyuk’s wedding finger, mirroring his own. “I love you, Min,” he said, kissing his hand again.

Minhyuk threw his arms around Jooheon and kissed him, a pretty, cartoon-pop kiss that echoed in the rapper’s ears and made him smile. “Forever and ever,” Minhyuk promised him, “forever and ever, I will love you.”

Jooheon pulled Minhyuk back into bed and attacked him with kisses. “Forever and ever,” he parroted. “No matter what.”

Minhyuk kissed him then, sealing their promise as the moon looked on, pleased.


End file.
